I have tried recording a video for like an hour or so.
I recorded till the battery went flat, and yet I did not get proper footage of anything.
In fact, I ended up deleting the best take because I thought I could do better.
And it didn't help that when I went on to Allkpop to see a bunch of stuff I do not want to see at the moment.
Maybe this is it, maybe this is what I am suppose to do...
Watch people live out the life I have always been dreaming of.
Live off doing things I hate for little money, or just live off my brother.
For once, I want to feel like there is nothing in the world that I can't achieve.
Why does it feel like I am counting right down to seconds to my worst nightmare.
I need to do something soon.
Something I can do that will not make me regret my choice...
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