New blogskin & more! :D

Ok, so I finally got a new blogskin. :D

I know it is a very basic one, but the previous one was just... D: so incomplete that it doesn't draw me to blog about anything at all.

ROAR.

I have been thinking a lot lately.

On top of getting pissed at people who probably have no idea that I am pissed with them.

Yay, it sure is nice being me. -_-

I have finally come to this conclusion : I have anger issues.

Major anger issues.

I usually am able to keep it in control, but recently it has been slipping out without me knowing anything.

I am just glad that there is no student-guidance-thingy in Poly for those who have major issues like anger management, or the suicidal.

Yeah, we (meaning our parents) pay good money for education. Expensive education, if I may add. And we don't get to enjoy student privileges like cheaper transportation fees, and someone to talk to when we need help when we are on the verge of committing suicide.

Meh, I am just glad they don't have shit like that. I was "recommended" to go for something like that back in secondary school. And while it was nice to have someone to talk to, it was also... a huge waste of my time.

Unlike for some, it is nothing near therapeutic for me. I have a better time talking to someone else these days.

Speaking of which.

I realise I would rather have a toy as a best friend, than a regular human being.

(Like I said, I did lots of thinking.)

Toys are less likely to leave you, betray you, make you sad, or infuriate you.

I just bought a new Transformers toy, and I am thinking that I am going to buy more.

I seriously need to get a life... D:

I shall randomly end this post while I go find something stupid to do. :/

... Did I mention that I am currently obsessed with Tetris? D:

I even dream about it while sleeping. D:

I really, really need to get a life.

And I have 2 videos to edit. D:

PHOTO! : New banner?

I am considering using that as my new blogskin. :/

Should I or should I not?! D:

Random Rant #1

It is one of the days where I feel utterly useless.

I have tried recording a video for like an hour or so.

I recorded till the battery went flat, and yet I did not get proper footage of anything.

In fact, I ended up deleting the best take because I thought I could do better.

And it didn't help that when I went on to Allkpop to see a bunch of stuff I do not want to see at the moment.

Maybe this is it, maybe this is what I am suppose to do...

Watch people live out the life I have always been dreaming of.

Live off doing things I hate for little money, or just live off my brother.

For once, I want to feel like there is nothing in the world that I can't achieve.

Why does it feel like I am counting right down to seconds to my worst nightmare.

I need to do something soon.

Something I can do that will not make me regret my choice...

I am not going to say much about what has happened today.

But if you say you don't want to work with a freeloader, what makes you think that people who got the same site as you want to work with you?

And it's blatantly obvious that you picked that site because you have found yourself someone nice enough for you to leech on.

And clearly I don't care if I get sued for defamation because I have worked with you long enough to know that you are a freeloader.

People choose to let things go and live their lives when things don't go well for them. I choose not to do that obviously, and I choose to get angry instead because letting things go just means giving up on things you want.

I choose to get angry and bitch all about it on my blog, knowing that the world can see, and knowing that while there are people out there who are going "O.M.G WHY IS SHE SO CHILDISH", at the same time, there are people who agree with what I have to say.

Photo! : Cakes and Bags

These photos are long overdue...

At least the photos of the bag is overdue.

I made a bag for Chu's birthday. :D Which kinda led me to think that I could have a future in this instead of slogging in the ID industry.

(I have a rant post coming up after this. But for now, photos first! :D )

So here's the bag :D

I made a giant top :D.

This is the bag and the top, and a photo taken at a very bad angle. :/

This is the inside of the bag, showing my excellent workmanship :D

And just the other day, I tried out a recipe, making chocolate cake using the microwave oven. :D

I have a regular convention oven, but I have yet to use it and using the microwave oven to make a cake is pretty convenient. :D

And even if it looks like shit, it still tastes the best. :D Super rich chocolate cake is the best. :D

PHOTO : MY NEW TOY! :D

Meet my new toy :D

:D A Roo PEZ Dispenser!! :D

Ignore the hair yo, I took this photo after making cookies and cookie-making is hard work ok.

PHOTO : MEET MY NEW FRIENDS :DD

I mentioned before on my blog that I bought a bunch of random, useless stuff from Ikea.

They are not entirely useless...

:D I bought 2 tiny pots of cacti, one for my room and one for school.

Because everyone knows how boring it is in school. And design students should just... really personalise their own work area. :D

So these are the cacti I had bought...

And you'll probably think it's damn ugly. Well, I only bought them for a reason, that it hurts when you touch them.

So to all the idiots out there who are going to annoy me in class, you watch out.

I HAVE MY CACTI!!

I wanted to name the one on the left, Unicorn, because its spikes stick out and concentrates on one area, like a unicorn's horn. But it sounded stupid, meh.

And I was with someone and that someone said, "Call it Bill... looks like his hair anyway"

Quite true, eh. :D

And the one on the left, that someone named it JoBros, because its 3 of them stuck together. -_-

Roar, I might have just killed the JoBros a bit by watering too much... :/

So this is unofficially named Bill. :D

And this is the unofficially named, JoBros... :/

Wake me up when September ends...

I know I haven't been updating as much as I have been planning to. :/

Last week had been a... pretty emotional, yet insanely annoying one.

You see, my grandmother had just passed away...

I, for one, am not very close to her. Our conversation every once a year goes a little something like this all the time.

R : Grandma.

G : Mm.

R : ...

G : *starts to ramble about being nice and filial to my mother in future*

*Mother nodding with approval.*

I am going to sound like an unfilial grand daughter in this post, but so what?!

Nobody is going to comment on it anyway. :/

Last week, while I was at her wake, I have made a few decisions on my life and death.

I will want a Western or Christian funeral. Where people go to the church, hear good stuff about me, sit down and talk about the good and awesome stuff about me while enjoying the buffet provided. Or they sing songs and walk around my coffin and the pastor prays.

I am not a Buddhist, Taoist, or any of the religions that requires the burning of joss sticks and kneeling and chanting.

(Sermons are like speeches, where the words are clear to me instead of chanting prayers. :/)

So being an offensive bitch, I really do not get it why must I kneel and listen/chant along with the monks. I really don't.

That week was only an emotional one because of all the drama around. You see people sobbing, people fainting, people crying till they fall down.

I only felt emotional when I saw my grand mother's coffin going into the furnace.

(Furnace right? where her body + the coffin got cremated)

Despite being the only unattached grand daughter of hers, I do have some fond memories of her. I remember her sitting outside whenever we go visit her after church.

I remember her giving me the ginko nut dessert thingy which I ended up giving to my mother because I HATE ginko nuts and the dates and the white fungus in it.

I remember her looking less weak and frail. And I remember the time she was able to talk and ramble on and on about taking care of my mother in future in Teochew which I obviously do not understand.

I guess I can only remember the good stuff when the person is really really far away from me. When their flesh and body can't be seen anymore, and when it gets shrunk from a coffin to an urn.

I don't feel particularly attached to anyone at all, actually.

I think I kinda scared a few people with my indifference. :/ The way I did the whole ritual without tearing, crying, sobbing or looking sad or something. :/

And it doesn't help that after the funeral, all the shows I watched happen to be really really sad. Like people leaving the guild (Fairy Tail), old people becoming senile (Can't Buy Me Love) and a lot of other ridiculous shows. Roar.

I shall just update again tomorrow.

It's Tuesday, and I am embarking on a new project soon. :D

Oh, and I did ok for my internship. :D I passed, and I am happy about it.